Of Allergies, Greek Mythology, Rhythm, Guatemala, Wizardy, and the name "Dewayne"

My brain works in funny ways. This song is proof of that. I wrote it. Enjoy.

Of Allergies, Greek Mythology, Rhythm, Guatemala, Wizardry, and the name "Dewayne"

I'd ask you

To excuse

My constant sneezing

But I can't seem

To get past all this wheezing

Long enough to say what needs to be said

It doesn't help

That its feels like a Titan

Stomped on my head

This dander and pollen

Im inhaling

Turned me from standing

Into fallen

But at the very least

I'm not quite Guatemalan

(Oh! Not quite Guatemalan)

I'd get a burst of adrenaline

Far beyond comparison

If I were Central American

Then my lack of rhythm

Would become

Oddly unbecoming

And impossible to explain

Which would cause my fear

To remain

And so scared would I be

I'd have to change my name

To some variation of "Dewayne"

Which, of course,

Would bring to mind

So many questions

That the previous

Would seem but fourths

They'd shower me

With inquiry

Which would, in turn,

Force me

To go on Reality TV

And announce my history

Somewhat bitterly

But it won't be trickery

Not even inwardly

When I begin to practice wizardry

To deal with my misery

Years later

I'll discover

A brand-new magic drug

With a clever slogan

Sold by a handsome spokesman

Who goes by the name of "Nolan"

The miracle medicine

Will do its job

And I'll be left

WIth what I sought

Only to realize

Its not what I want

And I'll miss my allergies

Once I only have memories

And the name "Dewayne"

Yeah...Im not sure about me either...