Unstrayified- The Blog Post.

     Today is a very special day for me. Its the 11th. Im sure most people think its a normal day. Its anything but. I was planning on posting all about this girl I know. But I read her blog (http://middleofnowhere3.blogspot.com/) and she inspired me to put a slightly different twist on it. Im going to fill in some details. My side of the story. As with hers, be prepared for sappiness.
     Im not sure where to begin. So lets just start where I did. At the beginning. I didn't know this at the time, but my life was changing drastically. My family was looking for a church. That was a big deal. Everything seemed like an adventure. I had no idea what was going to happen, or where my life was heading. Ever so slowly, God squeezed each and every drop of stubbornness out of me. I learned to trust Him. During this period of major upheaval, I did something weird. I gave the last thing I had been keeping under my control. I mean, sure at youth group and in sunday school I would say all the right things. I would say that God was in charge of my life and my relationships. He wasn't.
      So one night I stayed up late. I prayed for a long time. In my heart, I gave up the last bit of control I still had. I decided to let God choose a girl for me and bring her into my life. After all, that was how it was supposed to be, right? I'd go off to college, meet the perfect girl, we would have the perfect relationship. My life wouldn't be hard. I just had to focus on the right things. 
      Then we went to Salem Bible Church. I was all set. There was a whole new group of people to get to know. What better way to distract myself? Then something happened. For the first time in years I was off my guard. I wasn't looking for "The girl." That night I met her. I was talking to her dad and brother about ways to get to their house for a teen activity. She walked in. The little bit of understanding I had just gained about their house's whereabouts vanished. All I could think about was the really cute girl who had just walked in the room. I tried not to let myself get too smitten too soon. I had a plan to follow! Not two weeks earlier, I had given that very area of my life to God. I couldn't take it back so soon.
       We were introduced. And in less then a few seconds I blew it. My brain froze. I didn't know if it would be weird to shake her hand. So I kind of stuck my hand out then took it back just as fast. I left that night sure she thought I was a weirdo. She'd probably writen me off. But what did it matter anyway? I had my plan.
       Months drifted by. I fought the urge to stare at the girl who just seemed different. I had no idea why. Something just drew me to her. Eventually, she coaxed the weird part of me out into the open. And, to my surprise, she didn't run away. Friendship flourished. A kingdom was born. My attraction to her grew every day. I found myself unable to go a single day without communicating with her somehow. We became best friends. She was more like me than anyone else I'd ever met. She made me nervous, and she calmed me all at once. Almost without knowing it, I gave my heart to her. I began sharing my deep, dark, ugly secrets. Things no one else knew. Except for one secret. I really liked her. And I couldn't tell her. So I kept it hidden. I didn't tell her how pretty I thought she was, or how wonderful her laugh sounded, or how her smile was enough to kill me. I kept it to myself.
      One night we were talking. She told me something I had been expecting but a little afraid to hear. She said she liked me. I didn't really know what to say. Looking back, it would have been easy. I could have very simple confessed my feelings for her. Instead I stumbled around to them. A month or so went by. It was a strange month. Kind of in between dating and friendship. I knew I had to move it along. Being stuck there was becoming unbearable. So I got up the courage and talked to her father about us dating. I seriously misunderstood the conversation we had, because as far as I was concerned the answer had been somewhere between "no" and "maybe later." I spent a day being depressed. After I told Meg, I went for a very long walk. I needed to think. It took several miles, but eventually I came to grips with the situation that didn't exist. I decided that God had obviously brought this amazing girl into my life for a reason. I just needed to be patient. I resigned myself to waiting roughly 6 months and bringing up the subject again. I got home, logged onto facebook, and not 20 minutes later found out something unbelievable. I had misunderstood the whole thing. We could date.
       So we started dating. Time inched by. Together, Meg and I learned how to handle a whole host of complicated issues. Its been incredible and far from easy. I really don't know what Im doing half the time. But I know two things. God brought this amazing, beautiful girl into my life. And I can't stand the thought of her leaving my life. Sure, it will be hard. It already has been. We'll have to be patient now since we're so young. But I have something I never had before. I have her. The girl i will spend the rest of my life with. The girl I will marry. Someday. Quite a while from now.
         A lot of things have to happen first. And honestly, we have so much to learn. But we will learn it. And we will be there eventually. Someday, Im going to go back to this blog post. Im going to sit my beautiful wife down and read this to her. And we'll chuckle at our frustration of the long years ahead. And then we'll head off to have some adventures. Adventures God knew all about during those nights I couldn't stand being alone any longer. The ones He had in mind every time something happened that I didn't understand then. Adventures He knows all about now, when Im terrified of what the future holds. Most of its a mystery. Two things are certainties. I have God. And I have Meg. The rest can and will wait.
        Believe me, with 9 months of two of the weirdest people on the planet dating, there are countless stories I could tell of our time dating. I chose not to. Not yet anyway. Some are private. Others can wait. Ill get to them someday. Today, I wanted to make one thing abundantly clear. There is a girl named Meg, and she is in love with me. Not because I did anything, but because God's been doing things inside of me. I don't deserve her. I never will. In the words of one of my favorite songs, "I may feel like a fool, but Im the only one dancing with you." Thats it. I don't get why she loves me, but she does. She chose me. And I couldn't be happier.
       There are a million song lyrics I could quote to finish this. Look After You is first on that list, but Meg's already done that and there's no need to be redundant. Ill just quote Relient K. "I spent my life wondering. Wondering when I'd find you. I searched for all these years and now you're right here. I need you to know that everything makes sense when you're with me."So there you have it. That is but a brief explanation of how I fell in love with a Queen. My Queen. I love her more than anything. And I always will.