10. The one between Greg and his great-uncle's sheepdog, Xavier, right before their Guitar Hero showdown.
9. This is a 3-Googleplex-way tie between the stare-downs of every western movie ever made. You know, the part where they're both fingering their guns and waiting for the other to make a move? Yeah, that part.
8. The one that occurred after I stole Meg's meatball.
7. Let's just say that the first hip-hop artist ever, a bald llama, and a time-travelling boom box were all involved. No one within a hundred miles survived the encounter.
6. ...You don't want to know...
5. Someone stole Oprah's pencil in the 3rd grade...
4. Well, you see, its like this...Way back in the 1100's, a Knight named Sir Relphus was trying to fight a dragon to rescue a princess. It took the poor guy 20 years. Finally, when he killed the dragon he hurried through its lair looking for the princess. But she was gone. Three years later at a dinner party, he saw that very same princess with his brother, Sir Getrish. So he shoved a turkey leg up his nose (Don't ask...). The stare-down that resulted lasted for three days. Eventually King Arthur attmepted to break it up because it was getting awkward eating while they just stared. Which is how King Arthur got that little-known scar on his elbow.
3. Matt Damon isn't a fan of overcooked asparagus...
2. About three hundred years from now, an alien and the Emperor of Greenland will try to grab the same corn muffin at an "Accept Our Extraterrestrial Friends" all-you-can-eat buffet. Entire galaxies were destroyed.
1. The one that occurred after I grinned after I stole Meg's meatball. (I know it sounds familiar but its actually an entirely different stare-down than 8. If you'd been there you would understand.)
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